"Watch out for feces-throwing monkeys"

That was my dad's advice.

As I depart for Costa Rica in the morning, he doesn't warn me about safe travel, keeping my eyes open for the terrorists or avoiding the Costa Rican 'dope'. Instead he warns me about how his old Army buddy shot his rifle barrel cleaner at a monkey and was later ambushed and attacked by said monkey. Thanks, dad. I promise not to shoot any monkeys; I'll only spank them. Could you imagine explaining that to your friends? "Uh, a group of monkeys (who haven't intelligently designed as much as I) jumped out of a tree and whooped on me." Ouch! You get a black eye and a bruised ego. I'd tell my friends I insulted a drag queen's shoes instead.

We are headed to Puerto Quepos to celebrate three 40th birthdays (old people and their destination birthdays). If we have access to the internets, I'll post pictures as often as possible. If I am MIA for the week, you (my mystery reader) will know why.

Pura vida!

But don't talk back to Darth Vader...

If you missed this all over the internets yesterday, take a look at it here.
She is adorable!

Hot dogs and donuts

Though not as funny or hot as the the first, the cameos are worth the watch. Brad Pitt needs to shave. Be sure to check out Cameron Diaz's sign language at the end.

If Tina can do it...

Everyone needs a goal, and mine is to be as in shape as Tina Turner is when I am 68 years old (it is a much better shape than Aretha was in). That is going to take a lot of work (and not the kind of work that the woman selected to introduce the act has undergone). Starting today, I am going to make Proud Mary my new motivation - when I feel too tired to go to the gym, I am going remember Tina and Beyonce at the Grammys - if Tina can do it, I can do it!

Costa Rica is only 18 days and 23 hours away - I need abs by then! Proud Mary keeps on turning'

Mobile blogging part 1

I am at home sick and I wanted to try using 3 methods for mobile blogging. The first way to blog via mobile phone is by using Blogger's go@blogger.com service. This is a mms. I can also use speech-to-text via Jott.com and a .mp3 from Utterz. We'll see how they work.

UPDATE: I had to remove some lovely additions by Verizon.

Mobile blogging part 2

Alright this is it - this is the second way you can blog from your mobile phone and all you gotta do is call 1-866-568-8123. It's called Jott. You leave a message like this - it's got to be 30 seconds or less - and boom it's posted. So, let's see how that looks.

Next I am going to talk about voice blogging from my phone so, let's see how that turns out. Have a listen.

Powered by Jott

UPDATE: I did have to return to correct some errors, but they were minimal.

Mobile blogging part 3

Mobile post sent by joe.bechely using Utterz. Replies. mp3

"I can't use the word trombone anymore"

Without making this a gay blog, I have to share an hilarious pair of clips from one of my favorites, Stephen Colbert. He sat down with Joe Solmonese from the HRC. Good job, Joe, in representing the Fightin' Gays!



Pay attention to Joe's face when Stephen says, "vagina."

A little bit gay?

A little bit? Listen to the photographer - all the way to the end. A little bit?

Longer version is here.

Super Fat Tuesday

It's here - Super Tuesday. If you live in one of the 24 states casting ballots today, you need to exercise your civic duty and vote (as long as it's not for Mike Huckabee).

It's also Fat Tuesday, so time to get in all your vices before Lent.

That makes today Super Fat Tuesday.
If you are having trouble deciding between Obama and Clinton, the New York Times broke it down yesterday so everyone can understand - Mac or PC.

Make sure you do the drinking AFTER you vote or this could be our fate.

Lost in 8:15

If you missed the season premiere, you can catch it on ABC.com. If you missed the past 3 seasons, check out the video below to catch up in 8:15. This season is going to be good!


'Lost': Entire series in 8:15

Sarah is; I wish I was!

This is one more reason why I love Sarah Silverman AND Matt Damon.

Enjoy.